stephenandruth | Stephen & Ruth

Do The Next Right Thing

by stephenandruth | Jan 5, 2020 | Motivation, Positive thinking, Self-help

Having 4 girls it wasn’t going to be long before we saw Frozen 2, and yesterday we saw it.

Maybe you have too?

There are many quotes in the movie which offer some good moral pointers and I just want to share one of those with you today.

In seeking the truth, Anna could not see the future, at which point Pabbie, the wise troll counselled Anna:

“When one can see no future, all one can do is the next right thing”.

For many of us on life’s journey there are periods when the mist comes down and we can’t see the peak we were heading off to with such confidence. Remember, it’s OK not feel OK when the mist is down.

In the week ahead, if the future seems unclear, we simply need to do the next right thing, because our final destination may be out of sight, but we can all choose to place our our foot on the next right step.

For those of you who want to find out more about the hidden voices and women from Norway who inspired Frozen, then why not check out this short piece from Cantus, performing at the Holmelkollen Chapel, Oslo:

Click on the image below to watch

A Forever Gift

by stephenandruth | Jan 1, 2020 | Family, Gratitude

Today I received the best New Year gift ever from one of our girls, and apparently, it never expires…

Remember, the best things in this life aren’t things, they’re friends.

Wishing you and those dear to you a Happy New Year!

Daylight is coming

by stephenandruth | Dec 19, 2019 | Uncategorized

In this post, we just wanted to share an insight with you from David Zach, lead singer of the band Remedy Drive.

David wrote the song ‘Daylight’ and gave Ruth & I permission to use it in promoting the Butterfly Project as a legacy to our baby daughter, Butterfly.

A number of people asked where the song came from, well, who better to share its origin than David himself?

Remember, the darker the darkness, the more impact the tiniest of lights brings.

Be that tiny difference, and don’t waste your pain.

The Butterfly Project

by stephenandruth | Nov 14, 2019 | Uncategorized

When our daughter, Butterfly, died in June this year, we realise we had to take action in spite of our grief.

Funds donated to us in Butterfly’s memory were used to co-create a children’s play area in Northern Botswana from scratch.

Now, some vulnerable children, many with life limiting conditions, have a safe space to come together and simply enjoy being children.

This Sunday we’re sharing a private video we made of our formal opening of the play area last week:

One of Stephen’s favourite quotes comes from a devotional he read one sunrise whilst serving in Africa as a teenager:

“As we meet and touch each day

The many travellers on life’s way

 Let every such brief contact be

An encouraging helpful ministry.”

For him, it confirmed his sense that we are all travellers on a journey, and that no matter how brief our contact with another, we can encourage and help someone take their next step on life’s journey through a simple brief word or silent act of encouragement.

In the week ahead who do you need to come alongside to encourage on life’s journey?

Don’t waste your pain

by stephenandruth | Oct 10, 2019 | Gratitude, Grief, Motivation, Positive thinking, Self-help

If someone were to ask you what pain is there in your life, how would you answer?

Not to them but to you?

And if you answered that question truthfully to you, do you see any value in that pain?

We had to consider that question in our recent loss.

We knew we had a choice to make. We could let the pain of grief rob us, or we could use our pain as a form of currency to add value to others.

As parents we were overjoyed to be expecting our 5th daughter, Butterfly, in June of this year, but then scans revealed our daughter had a number of complications which meant we wouldn’t have long with her.

Sadly in the hours before Ruth was to give birth, Butterfly’s heart stopped completely, and she died in the womb.

Privilege and Pain

Our pain at our loss was real, but Ruth counts it a privilege to have carried Butterfly for 38 weeks, and I counted it a privilege to have carried Butterfly in my own arms to her resting place.

All in all it was a privilege to carry Butterfly.

Following our loss a number of well-wishers donated some funds to us and we started The Butterfly Project as a legacy. Since then we’ve been working with Butterfly’s Auntie & Uncle who are serving some vulnerable individuals on the edge of the Kalahari desert, Botswana.

This weekend we’re flying out to Botswana to formally launch the Butterfly Project there by opening a playground we’ve designed and constructed from scratch which will act as a safe space for children to just enjoy being children, many of whom, also have a limited life expectancy.

Our Appeal To You

As part of this process that we’ve been through, we want to make an appeal to you, and it’s not for your money. We believe your money should be used by you to make a difference in your own circle of influence, wherever you’ve been placed.

Our appeal to you is to reflect on this;

If the pain in your life was money, how would you spend it?

Because the world looks at pain as loss, but we believe it’s an asset we can use to connect with a fellow human being and add value to them at their point of need.

Maybe you’ve been through chemo, or some kind of surgery, or whatever?

There’s someone in your circle right now who’s about to go through chemo or surgery, or whatever, and they just need a call from you to let them know you’ve been there, to let them know, YOU KNOW THEIR PAIN.

So, our appeal to you is, don’t let your pain be wasted, and don’t let it rob you.

If pain is going to be our co-pilot on life’s journey, then let’s press on and use it to make a difference in this hurting world.